I DID IT BITCHES!

This is a quickie: I just received my acceptance into the creative writing department at the University of British Columbia. Freakin' finally. Done. I did it.

Now I just have to do it….

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

"The Beauty of the body that was broken for our forgiveness…"

Tomorrow is my favourite day and I preparation for it I wanted to post just a short meditation. My bestie Lacey receives these mediations every day that are magnificent and I want to post them here. You can subscribe to them through the Centre for Action and Contemplation.

I thank you, Lord Jesus, for becoming a human being

so I do not have to pretend or try to be God.

I thank you, Lord Jesus, for becoming finite and limited

so I do not have to pretend that I am infinite and limitless.

I thank you, crucified God, for becoming mortal

so I do not have to try to make myself immortal.

I thank you, Lord Jesus, for becoming inferior

so I do not have to pretend that I am superior to anyone.

I thank you for being crucified outside the walls,

for being expelled and excluded like the sinners and outcasts,

so you can meet me where I feel that I am,

always outside the walls of worthiness.

I thank you for becoming weak, Lord Jesus,

so I don’t have to be strong.

I thank you for being willing to be considered

imperfect and strange,

so I do not have to be perfect and normal.

I thank you, Jesus, for being willing to be disapproved of,

so I do not have to try so hard to be approved and liked.

I thank you for being considered a failure,

so I do not have to give my life trying to pretend I’m a success.

I thank you for being wrong

by the standards of religion and state,

so I do not have to be right anywhere, even in my own mind.

There is death in sin but we find life in Christ's sacrifice for us and we find joy in the Eurcharist of remembering that sacrifice. May tomorrow be a miracle. And may it be sunny. And you eat lots of hot cross buns. And booze.

"Cuz it's the wrong'em boyo."

FOR TODAY

• Outside my window…Daffodils! Spring has sprung. This weekend the camera and I are taking a walk. 
• I am thinking…don't relax yet. 
• I am thankful for…My Moozh. He leaves for a retreat centre tomorrow until Saturday night. I'm going to miss his snuggles and awesome pre-sleep pajama pant dance. 
• From the learning rooms…Finished my portfolio and my gender theory essay. Now I just need to start (!) my GMO foods assignment, practice my Russian dialogue and write a web series. Whew.
• From the kitchen…a matcha latte with cinnamon. Mmmm for home. 
• I am wearing… my vintage cameo and thigh high socks. (Among other things of course.)
• I am creating…a portfolio, two competition submissions, irish soda bread and a knitted scarf.  
• I am going…outside! Bankybear is showing the sun! So. Bright.
• I am reading…The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. I haven't been able to get past the front cover yet. How I long for the days of recreational reading. 
• I am hoping…for warmer days. Believe it or not I'm getting tired of big socks. 
• I am hearing…Catastrophe and the Cure by Explosions in the Sky. 
• Around the house…boots under construction. Smouldering Yankee Candle filling the house with caramel.  My backpack looking menacing (and full). 
• One of my favorite things…caraway seeds (for the aforementioned irish soda bread). I love their earthy smell. 
• A few plans for the rest of the week: Celebration post-portfolio submission! And Saturday is a sleep day. Fer sure. 

Here is picture for thought I am sharing…

This is my city!
And that yellow triangular mound in the upper right hand corner. That's sulphur.
Photo from Flickr by ecstaticist

"Now I'm gonna dress myself for two. Once for me and once for someone new..."

I am officially a paid writer! Frig I'm practically syndicated!


Except....okay.


I wrote a piece for the literary supplement because a friend of mine was the editor for it. Little did I know you could win first, second or third place and there was money! Now I only won $25 but I won $25! This may be the largest paycheque I ever get from my writing but I am so proud. I will so enjoy that one Starbucks coffee. I can afford to get it with whip this time!


I need to take a moment out of this post to make mention of all the kickass bitches in my life. (According to my gender theory textbook, being a third-wave feminist, it is totally empowering to phrase it like that.) The Lord has really put amazing, dynamic and diverse women into my life that have gifted me with laughter, profundity, and authentic friendship. They's the best.


I have been waiting for a suitable time to get out and take some more pijjers this week but it has been so gross this week. It snowed mucus snow again earlier this week and then it's been "winter in Vancouver" fairly consistently. Slippery and overcast. So overcast that I would require our external flash that pretty much replicates an atomic bomb blast. I'm not that hardcore yet. I realized I haven't even made it down to Granville Island with the new camera, not to mention that I haven't made it to Coal Harbour, Commercial Drive, Kerrisdale or Stanley Park. Do I deserve to live in a beautiful city? I have by no means earned it.


In my Writing for New Media course, we're in the blogging unit right now, which just sounds funny. Stick something unconventional in a conventional box. Quick! "This is my three box set of Bansky installation art pieces. It was a Chapters special..." (although how sweet would that be). "This is the first of my University lecture series on Advocating Anarchism..." Maybe this is just fun for me. Anyways, the blogging is super fun to think about, it doesn't even feel like work. Our next assignment, however, is a collaborative gaming assignment. Which I know to everyone else is so friggin pimp but I just don't...get it. It's collaborative for one, which for me is frustrating. I work so much more effectively when I don't have to share. I was talking with my group about what we were going to do (which was essentially me having to stick my hand up their ass and puppet them by hand because they're awkward out of their minds!) and we were talking about RPGs, which for other video game illiterate people means 'role-playing game' and colloquially addresses video games even though it can apply to literature and board games. And then I asked, "Is that like Zelda?" And they just stared at me. And I felt dumb in my chair. Stupid puppets.


I know quite a few people actually that work and/or go to school in the gaming universe (all through Westside) so I can probably pillage -I mean ask them meaningful questions and they can point me in the right direction. I just can't do Grand Theft Auto, not for an academic assignment. What about Call of Duty? Or Assassin's Creed? Those are B-A in a big way, even for me.


Now go find somewhere that has great pie and go have a slice.


P.S - I'm watching the State of the Union right now and it should be majestic but I'm SO BORED. Where is Josiah Barlett?


P.P.S - I just saw a link for bacon jam. I don't think it's just me. That's sounds disgusting.

Toodle Loo Bankybear

So my new blogosphere of devotion is SheWrites. Their tagline is "A Room of Her Own Just got Bigger" which makes me want to die it's so genius. I've been trying to figure out how to 'bust out' my blogging if you will. I'm not a genius photographer (not that I couldn't become one), I'm not a proficient chef (see reason #1), I don't enjoy posting pictures of my outfits online (though maybe one day?) and I don't get a kick out of blogging about other people's outfits. I don't plan weddings, or deliver babies, or craft my day away making custom camera straps or pants for children 4-10. I write. And I want to write well.

On my portfolio site (which is in desperate need of a facelift) I want my blog to be reflective of who I am as a writer. Here I can swear, and talk about my marriage. I can post links to cute baby pictures or hilarious YouTube vids. There I want to grow as a writer and make a point of exercising my ability in different forms. One of my creative writing classes next semester is writing for new media which looks at blogging and similar new forms. I want to take this next period of time to really become familiar with it.

Which is why I'm so excited about SheWrites. Like NaBloPoMo, it's a site that is a support to writers and to bloggers. And because they quote Virginia Woolf, they are fun, feministy types.

Hopefully, this site can help me to articulate better what kind of writer I want to be. I know why kind of writer I don't want to be but as G.K Chesterton says, you end up standing for nothing.

This is from SheWrites. May this be a fruitful union.

Literary Love Affair

When I first began to read, it was everything from Bailey School Kids Mysteries to Black Beauty and Little Women. I read Number the Stars and Under the Quilt of Night and they opened my eyes to the possibility, tragedy and fascination that the world held. I went through a lengthy "cute animal centred mystery" phase.

When I first began to write, I had books like I am David and The Giver on my mind. I began to write very young and while I can't necessarily stand by my writings of the 'old days'. I wanted to travel to distant places and my imagination could take me there.

When I first began to raid my mother's bookshelves, I read The Red Tent in junior high and it blew my mind. I think I read through the entire Old Testament that summer.

When I first began to have my bookshelves stocked by English professors, it was Margaret Atwood, Alice Monroe, and Sylvia Plath. I read Faulkner, Twain and Adrienne Rich. I read Aristotle, Anne Sexton, and Fyodor Dostoyevsky.

When I fell in love with poetry, it was Margaret Atwood, Carol Ann Duffy, and Anne Sexton.

When I fell in love with the short story, Alice Monroe, Flannery O'Connor and Tim O'Brien.

I can't remember when I didn't love the novel. Lately it's been Audrey Niffenigger, Mary Shelley (Frankenstein actually scared me when I read it), and C.S Lewis.

Over the years my writing teachers, Dale Wallace, Bill Gaston, Carla Funk, Joan McDonald and John Gould. The introduced me to writers that I couldn't help but find. John Vailant, Leonard Cohen, Martin Amos and I, Claudia.

Music hijacks my mind. I've been listening to The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford soundtrack lately and my fingers just fluttery. It pulls me into a different space. Explosions in the Sky does the same. Mind. Blown.

My friends Ginny Monaco, Jenica Chuahiock and Kirsti Doggart remind me that I'm a writer, even when I don't write. (My mom and dad do that, too.) We sit around our workshop and ooze what makes us passionate and simultaneously ecstatic about writing.

Who inspired you to write? Who inspires you now? Tell us the story of your literary love affairs.

Margaret Atwood (my computer will probably know her name off by heart I talk about her so much), Susan Perkins Gilman, Eli Weizel, John Vailant, Anita Diamant and C.S Lewis.

At least there will be plenty implied

This month has been a wonderful blog month. I began NaBloPoMo which has initiated a love affair and a growing respect for my blog and for habit.

1. I discovered Today's Letters, which has taken me by storm.

Emily and Tim Loerke are a couple from Dallas, Texac. Her bio makes me die it is so adorable. It reads, "Mr. Loerke and I have been married for 5 years. We like to dance in our jammers, sleep late in the biscuit, build forts, write each other love letters, and spend lots of time in the kitchen experimenting with food. We also get to ask each other for forgiveness each day. Holla." Seriously, oh my goodness. They are incredible God loving couple who love small groups, ice cream and calling the things in their life by funny names. They call their car a fart box and their bed a biscuit. AWWWWWESOME! My favourite posts (at the moment -they seriously get cuter and more awesome every day) would be their Halloween post because they drew her beard on with those smelly marker and the post where they talk about how they met and fell in love because honestly who doesn't love those stories. And the posts are back to back! They. Are. Great.

2. I love Bluebird Baby. She is a photographer out of Maine and even just the photos of her house are mesmerizing. She's a big antiques person (so is Emily Loerke actually! There's a mathematical equation here waiting to happen) but she did a reno on her kitchen that I can't get over. The open face cabinets are beauuuuuutiful. Krasivaya! She does every monday, these links pages that are so great. Get's you listening to new music, looking at new pictures, and seeing new sites. Gweat! She has the cutest little daughter who dresses herself like a total champ and she has the cutest love ever too. She has a whole category called, "I love Sasa". Ummms yes.

3. I will put Smitten Kitchen on here because I truly spend an inappropriate amount of time on food blogs. Which is crazy because I don't even really like cooking that much. Or eating. But on every blog I've ever been on in their link tab they have Smitten Kitchen listed. Everyone loves her. And she's Jewish, which means I love her. She also has a surprise me button which is every browsing web surfer's nemesis because it keeps you there longer than you ever intended to stay. But if you really wanted to invest your time in meaningful things you wouldn't be surfing the net. :) This looks delish and many a Casa del Dempsey staple in it. I want to eat far more sweet potato because I'm a tuber hound. Cheers.

Prompt!

P.S~ I've been trying to resist until December 1 but the Christmasness is working itself into my mind. I have a Christmas playlist on my iPhone now. And we got a Yankee Candle. Merry Christmas!

I feel like they're speaking in a language I don't speak. And they're talking it to me.

What do you *really* wish you were doing right now, and how soon do you think you can make it happen?

I wish I was living overseas right now. My husband could be in Grad school, that would be awesome. St. Andrews

in Fife, Scotland, the third oldest University in the English speaking world (first and second being Oxford and Cambridge, respectively). I'm more articulate just talking about it so just think how brilliant I will become if I can rub shoulders with all those weird PhD students.

Scandinavia has really been on my mind lately. Norway, Sweden, Denmark. They is a different mind set there, I don't know how they

do it. The advances they make in gender relations, climate change, medicine, urban planning, geniuses all of them.

Vancouver has had a really profound effect on both Matt and I since we've been here and it's had a really profound effect on our marriage.

Victoria will

always be special to me and it still makes me smile to think of it and our time there but it was really useful for Matt and I to articulate what we needed as a couple and weren't getting in Vic. It is so obvious to me that the Lord has us here. In other words, I am very happy here but he made a fascinating, dynamic world and I want to see it.

I wish I was making my living off of my word (because that simply sounds so romantic I can't get over myself).

This semester has been really hard for me creatively because I hit a bit of writer's block. The

more I write the more I get the hang of it. I encountered a similar obstacle last year, struggling to write anything or find any momentum in the process, and then in the last cycle of WRIT 100, I hit it out of the friggin' park. At least I follow a similar pattern. If only I could speed up the stretching period a little. I know part of it this year is I'm just not inspired in this program. Last year, I was simply blown away by my professor. Not that my professors here are in any

way less so but at UVIC the professors seemed to this energy about writing which I haven't quite encountered here yet. But UBC is probably three times the size of UVIC so there are other factors at play. It blows my mind daily how many students actually go there.

This is from an Australian blog and it is genius. I should go to Australia too.

I wanted to include this because Calvin and Hobbes is always appropriate.

P.S ~ I also wish I was done school but I didn't really think I should include that. Seems a tad whiney.

"With his long johns on Pa went out creepin'..."

Whoohoo for prompts!

A lover of blogs and a true sufferer of writer's block, I LOVE websites that ask me fun questions. National Blog Posting Month is a website that provides tools for people that are looking to post more regularly (and become the next great thing). They also say they offer "moral support, inspiration, and camaraderie" for those involved in the blogging community. Gives it a formidable hue, no? I'm not going to sign up for those camaraderie things because that sounds...scary but I will willingly take their hints and tips towards better blogging.

The last prompt posted was "What childhood belonging do you still have in your possession?"

Though I desperately wish it could be my fuchsia dinosaur stuffed animal from my toddlerhood that mysteriously disappeared with nary a trace, I have only my baby blanket that my great-grandmother crocheted for me. Tucked in the Porcheron abyss of a crawl space are still things like my 'quiet book' (AS IF I needed any help with that) and my 'prayer pillow', things that will make me squeal when I have poop-sack, beanheads of my own. Mom, three points for you for being a sentimental mama. No woobie capes, but my blanket is folded and duck taped into storage with a crocheted robe from the same grandmother, one of my dad's mega soft t-shirt that he laundered to a suede finish flipping houses (that I also think my mom tried to throw away many a time) and a vintage beige clutch I filched from my mom when I was in high school and never gave back.

Seriously, what. Cutest lobster EVAR.

Hope your halloween was deliriously cute.